April 18, 2001

Village Found to be Subletting Room

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By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS

Filed at 11:24 a.m. ET

NYU Housing Office (AP) -- Residents of Rubin Hall are both confused and furious after learning that a small Vietnamese village has been secretly subletting a 7th floor room for the past 3 months. Although it is currently unclear how long the medical school's housing office has known of this situation, a formal announcement was not made until earlier this morning.

Residents of the 7th floor have complained for weeks of the unusual activity occuring in room 729. The numerous claims referred mostly to the room's high volume of visitors, the sound of multiple crying infants, and an unusual stench, later determined to be noodle soup cooking on portable hotplates.

Nina Z, a neighbor, remarked, "I can't believe it! I'm didn't come to this school to live next to hordes of illegal aliens stinking up the f&!$ing floor! How many people are they stuffing in there anyway?" Sources have informed the Times that at one point, it is believed as many as 38 people were regularly using the room in some capacity.

The Vietnamese subletters left from the village of Tuong-Phet-Bai-Voung approximately 6 months ago, hiding within an empty cargo container aboard a shipping vessel. After arriving in New York, they wandered about the streets for several weeks before encountering an "Available Sublet" sign posted on a medical center bulletin board.

"We not criminals," one unidentified resident told us. "We just come to America for opportunity. Why don't people let us alone."

The medical school has not yet decided a course of action regarding the immigrants, although the village has been rumorred to have contacted the ACLU for legal advice. The identity of room 729's original occupant was not available at this time.